Wow! What a Big Apple!

To tell you the truth I really never thought I would go to America. The only place that really held any interest for me was New York. It's a bit of a bucket list place for me but as there are so many other countries in the world I want to see I wasn't sure I'd ever get there. Well, we've uprooted the family, had a massive (and sometimes unsettling) year, our children speak with American accents and we've had to watch the Olympics without Joanna Griggs but isn't that all worth it to spend a week in New York?

Before I get to New York though let's do a debrief of Mark and Pat's pedal to the metal visit. As a natural list maker and family holiday historian Pat gave me a list of everything they purchased while in SoCal. I submit that list now for your reading amusement. The comments in parenthesis are editorial)

watch (2 watches purchased, one DKNY and Pat had to continually ask me what the DKNY stood for)
Make up (including literally massive quantities of mascara. Really. She kept going back to the store for more. It's a five year supply at least).
Batteries (I don't even know how much Mark purchased but every time we went to the supermarket he would make a bee line for the battteries. It would seem that batteries and mascara are much cheaper here but we were considerably worried about him getting through security at LAX with that many batteries in his luggage.)
2 necklaces and 1 pair of earings
Travel Shaver (Mark's beard was getting a little big and he had to shave like George Michael for a while so was necessary purchase)
Nighty
Ashtray x2 (one from Vegas and one for Ned with Harley Davidson theme)
Novelty Talking Elvis Pen (when you press the button it says 'thank you very much' among other gems
Back Massager (to relieve stress from shopping for novelty purchases)
Wooden Shell (nick nack type thing going straight to the pool room)
Ped Egg x 2 (like a cheese grater for your feet for at home pedicure. One for Mum, one for Gayle)
Opaque Tights
Cocktail Glasses from Bubba Gump Shrimp co (which was lunch destination)
Skirt (size 2. Mum would want me to tell you that. Is very proud family moment)
Frock (for Amanda's fabbo upcoming wedding)
San Fransisco Mug
Shoes (obvioulsy)
Shot Glasses (obviously)
Glasses form the fabulous Las Vegas Luxor x2
Cashmere Cardigan (was bargain of the trip. $10 from Gap)
Novely Oscars x2 (displaying such awards as 'worlds best Grandmother' etc)
Sunglasses (which broke on the way home)
20 t-shirts (20!!!!!!)

They got home safe as many of you know and it was really terrible to say goodbye and I had a bit of a teary drive home from the airport but it's all good. Especially because while they were here they looked after the kids and we went to New York! Let me tell you about it.

We took the red eye from vegas (I mean seriously...how cool does that sound!!!!!!) and arrived at the crack of dawn (8.00am) in NYC but obviously, as is American custom you can't get into your hotel room until practically midnight (3.00pm). We ate eggs in a jerry seinfield type diner and we were so tired we went to Central Park and sat down and then had a little sleep on the grass (for 2 hours). We went to the big Museum with actual proper dinosaurs (though not alive obviously) and that was the day.

The next day a very unfortunate incident occured. After giggling like school girls at the MOMA because everywhere we looked was the most famous painting in the world we made our way down Park Ave, along 5th ave, through the park and to the Guggenheim (BIG bucket list item). Davy and I had considerable difficulty getting in though. We tried this door and that door and couldn't find the entrance. We decided to ask at the gift store and (this is where the unfortunate incident occured) I opened the bloody door over my bloody toe breaking it (my toe, not the door). I sat down to have a moment while davy went in and asked how to get in to the museum and was told 'the museum is never open on Thursday" in a voice to rhyme with 'you bloody idjit!" This all brings me to my next list as a historical recorder of holidays (must be genetic)
Things that are hard to do with a broken toe
1. walk 30 blocks
2. listen to husband saying 'walk it off chick, it's only 30 blocks'
3. ride subway with so many people it seemed like entire population of Sydney in car with us (though obviously if Sydney was populated entirely with Americans)
4. Walk with husband around entire Battery Park and seemingly entire island of Manhatten

The only thing that consoled me was that I left blood on the underside of Frank Lloyd Wright's beautiful building thus linking me to the Guggenheim in future times when they uncover relic and find my DNA.

The next day I got up and walked to the bathroom (which granted is not a very long walk in a New York hotel room) and my toe felt great. It looked bad for sure and i knew it would be a while before i wore my lovely new stilletos but it felt so much better I thought I'd be fine. Unfortuantely, after using the bathroom I opened the bloody door over my bloody toe again....same toe!!!!! After crying I got dressed and we went to catch a boat.

We waited in line with what seemed like the entire population of Melbourne and got on a cruise type thing to go and look at the Statue of Liberty. It was a 75 minute cruise and unfortunately after the first 15 minutes davy started to say.."Seen it. I want to get off now."

We did make it to the Guggenheim and Davy made sure to interpret the sculpture pieces for me by whispering such critiques as 'that's poo with buildings on it' etc. I spent most of the time in alcoves doubled over laughing.


Most of you know that Davy and i can''t stand musicals and we felt such peer pressure to go to a show ("you simply must see a show in New York) but WHY? WHY? Why do they have to sing every word? Instead we went to a Yankees game and watched the A-Rod do not very much. We did eat peanuts and hot dogs and drink beer and had a fantastic time though!!!!! And then we had a night in Vegas, total winnings none. Total losses, considerable. Then we came home. The End.

Mark and Pat's T-Shirt buying Spree Across California

Due to technical difficulities (i.e. laziness) I haven't updated the blog in a while. Nothing much happened here for a really long time and then all of a sudden, there's a million things to write about.....life's like that really, isn't it? Anyway, Mum and Dad are here right now and we've done so much that it's hard to report it all so once again I've put my brilliant talents to use and constructed a poem detailing the recent past events. We've been everywhere man (and I'm starting to wonder whether they're actually interested in the cultural events and sights they have seen or just see it as another great place to buy a novelty t-shirt. Anyhoo, get ready to be wowed.....

First it was quite
All was a hush
Then Mark and Pat arrived
And all was a rush

"What next? What next? What should we do?
What's on tomorrow?'" was all they could say
and I started to wonder
When are they going away?

So we took them to Universal
They saw sets and crashes and burning planes
they rode on rides
and loved Wisteria Lane
(t-shirts purchased 3)

They were attacked by Jaws
which made Mark move
Which was quite different from Macy's
Where we lost Pat and bought shoes
(t-shirts purchased 4. Total T-shirt count 7)

Then...."What next? What now?" they would say
'Where shall we go? What's on today?"

So off to Santa Monica
we ate lunch at Bubba Gump
Then onto Muscle Beach
where we saw lot's of lumpy bumpy lumps.
(t-shirts purchased 2. Total t-shirt count 9)

And then we got home.
"What next" They did say.
"What are the plans for tommorrow?
What shall we do with the day?"

So I took them for a drive
Five hours at least
To San Fransisco
Along highway 5. east.

We took the Golden Gate Bride
And took pictures and said ooh! Ay!
But then we realised it wasn't the Golden
It was only the bay (bridge that is)

We froze on the wharf
Took a boat in the Bay
We saw Alcatraz
But decided not to stay
(t-shirts purchased 3. total t-shirt count 12)

Then we drove home
After China Town and a cable car
but it wasn't long
We didn't get very far........before

"What next? Where to? Where shall we go?
What places can we see? What stuff can we know?"

So Lord have mercy, I had an idea
I gave them the car
and told them
"Go away, go away, go very far from here"

I put gas in the van
and sent them on their way
To Las Vegas they went
At Sin City they did go astray
(T-shirts purchased 2. total T-shirt count 14)

Peace. And then the phone rang
"Oh what a day! What things we have seen!
What places we have stayed"

"We've been to the Grand Canyon
We've toured Hoover Dam
We've gambled at Casinos
We've been proositioned for a time share scam!"

And then in this litigious land, Pat fell down
In the Luxor Foyer
There was water on the floor
"Do you know a good lawyer?"

They saw Paris and the Pyramids
New York and the strip
And they're even getting the hang
of when to give a tip

And then today they came home
"where next? Where too?
How many T-shirts do I now own!?!"

So back in the van i will go
More t-shirts to buy
emblazoned with words like
Hollywood! Beverly Hills! and Rodeo (drive that is)
predicted t-shirts they will purchase 17 000 (feels like)

But next week my karma pays up
Davy and I are off on a plane
To New York, to the met
and to a Yankees game (Go Yankees..... whoever you are)

And then when we get home
More things to do they will seek
Which I will fill you in on
After I've slept for a week.

Goodbye Regent St

I know we said goodbye to Regent St some time ago but wait......did you know that we STILL hadn't sold the house???? Well, we had sold it but the buggers made us jump through nearly 6 months of elaborate title and government related hoops but.......we just got word not five minutes ago people that it will all be settled on Thursday so, cross your fingers and toes and send good vibes to the universe for us.

Davy has one question though.....he has proposed taking all the money, going to Vegas and putting it all on in one hit. But should it be red or black? Please indicate your preference on the new poll section of this ever evolving highly tecnologically advancedy bloggy.

My life as an Alien

my life as an alien

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Ms Van-Barnett goes to Vegas

Part One - The van

Many of you will recall the Volkswagon Bug I owned while I was at college and those of you who didn't know me then will surely have heard me bang on about the time I strapped a semester's worth of painting canvases to the roof racks only to have them blow off on the F3's Mooney Mooney Creek Bridge, destroyed and lying over the freeway. Close listeners of the story will recall that I traversed the bridge, clinging to the side to gather up my work only to have someone stop and try to give me a lift back to the bug, a sorry choice to be made between getting into the car of the presumed Balangalow State murderer (who was as yet uncaptured at the time) and falling to my death over the bridge with traffic hurtling past me at 120 kph. Where am I going with this? Well ever since that milestone turning point type day in my life I have hankered after a car that was HUGE and could fit a million things in it. At the time I was fiercely jealous of Jussy's combi van and have had a very secret love of van's ever since. That's right people....I love vans.

Well, as usual the man of my dreams has made all of my dreams come true by compensating for the glaring impracticality of a family of four owning a mustang with practically little more parcel shelf for a back seat (which of course I LOVE) and buying me a van........hang on, he gets a sports car and I get a soccor Mom mobile........oh Jesus, he's done it to me again! Will discuss THAT with him this evening! Here is a picture of my beloved Dodge Caravan. God, i even love the name. dodge

isn't she lovely. (sing that to the tune of Stevie Wonder's isn't she lovely)

Part Two - The van fits relatives in it and leaves Bear Valley.....

The van (or bus as I prefer to call it) had her maiden long trip type voyage this weekend. We have Davy's parents staying with us at the moment and Davy, Paul and I took a trip to Vegas (and even though we only had three in the car we really could have had seven if we wanted I assure you). OMG people!!!!! I love Vegas. It really is one of my favourite places on the planet and no one is more surprised than me, well, maybe Davy who kept saying 'I can't believe you like it here!". Definitely in the top 5. Let's see, Sydney, Paris, Barcelona, Vegas, Maitland (and really you can practically see all those places in Vegas anyway making them somewhat obsolete!) I did have a fancy smancy video to show off with which highlighted the voyage to Vegas but obviously I am completely inept and can't make the bloody thing download. I have been trying for a week and the bloody thing keeps closing on me and having nervy turns so I will just have to do it the old fashioned way....with photos and my fabulous descriptive writing style...... Here is a photo of us leaving Bear Vally.

It was quite snowy.

Part Three - What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas

Here is photo taken on the drive to Vegas. By the way, the van drove beautifully and was so comfy. I took a snooze in the back. I bought my pillow and blankie. The drive was quite deserty and long but strangely, the desert was quite green as it is spring although you'd never bloody know it in this freezing town.

I can't tell you what happened in Vegas as it has to stay in Vegas blah blah but I can tell you that in one night we experienced Ancient Greece, Italy, France, saw Rio and then the next morning the sphinx and pyramids. Vegas is such a mix of energy, cheese and glamour. All my favourite things! Here is a photo of cheezy, glamorous nightlife. It's easy to spot our hotel as it has a whopping big Eiffel tower out front! I mean, why would you go to Paris people?

Later......Part Four - what happens next.........
well, not much really. Mary and Paul have left us to enjoy the sun in Hawaii, (bloody hell they have a life I tell you!) leaving us only with a strange, vacant void and no one in the back room /guest quarters. While they were here we had trips to Santa Monica, Davy and I took advantage of our live in nannies and saw Paul Kelly play in a restaurant in Hollywood and some of the luckier members of the family took in a couple of days skiing at Mammoth (by this i mean it wasn't me and there is some resentment there I assure you. Note to self, squeeze it into a tiny ball).

Life here continues to go on. It's still freezing and even though it's technically 'spring' and things are green and lovely we still got snow on Sunday morning. I'm starting to long for the summer. "Spring Break' is over and the kids go back to school so my normal routine kicks in. Although somewhat more fabulously as now I have been accepted as a fully fledged van driving American MOM. (I'm quite popular now with the other Moms as I AM ONE OF THEM............AAAGGGHHH. only joking, really, i love them!(And some of them read this so I must be careful and obviously i don't mean you!). There may have to be slight changes to my routine however.....I still crack myself up every morning by asking the kids to show me their bus passes before they board my 'bus'. Sabine has started giving me 'the look'. Apparently I am too daggy for words, and George admonished me severely saying my van was NOT a bus and citing as evidence the (alleged) facts that buses are clearly yellow and seat considerably more than seven people. Bah Humbug! Miss you people!!! Oh and by the way don't admonish me if I've spelt desert wrongly. I get so confused between the place and the thing wot comes after ya tucker.

Happy Bloody Valentine's Day

I love Australians. I love their skepticism and their reluctance to jump whole heartedly into silly Hallmark Holidays. Don't get me wrong, I like a bunch of flowers as much as the next girl but all things Velentine's here are strange and unnerving. For instance, Valentine's Day here hugely involves kids. I know. It's creepy. Valentine's Day should be about making children, it's not something you celebrate with them. Let me give some examples.......both George and Sabine have big parties at school today. They had to bring cards for everyone in their class (which meant Mummy had to do craft card making activities with them). They had to bring biscuits ( I just WILL NOT call them cookies) or little treats to give out (which meant Mummy had to bake Love Heart shaped items iced with fetching shades of pink and then wrap in cellophane, see picture). Then lots of parents buy gifts for their children. Creepy. Children got Leggo and Valentine's Balloon bouquets. You'd never catch an Aussie going so OTT! Is there any holiday that these people don't celebrate? And is there any holiday that doesn't involve the overconsumption of candy? The constant celebrations though does have a strange inverse effect. It kind of dilutes the big holidays. By the time you have Halloween, Thanksgiving, Valentines, 4th July etc, Christams just isn't a big as a deal as it is at home.



The snow has all melted now. We had a lot of snow (the mustang got bogged in the snowy driveway (so there was Davy and I in the dark -2 degrees celcius digging it out and rocking it back and forward!) but davy did acomplish getting it to the driveway in the first place by nailing it up the steep snow covered hill that is our street sidways with the traction control off. Just when we finally get a proper week of school with no snow days, wouldn't you know it, Friday and Monday are 'school holidays' which means that school children and teachers get the day off but not the general population. If I ever do get a visa I truely don't know how I'll work. In between snow days and these constant holidays I'd never get there! These two holidays are both for Presidents Day. Count em people, two Presidents Days. I think one is for George Washington and the other day is for all the others. They just get lumped together. Here is a video of the fun we had on the last snow day when even Davy couldn't get to work, (They closed the highway)


In other news Sabine has lost her two front teeth and her two bottom and the adult teeth are not coming through so well. Seems her mouth is too small (she didn't get that from me!) and all the teeth are just stacked up there in her gums, literally on top of each other. She went to the orthodontist yesterday and it seems that the poor child will have to have some sort of apparatas in her mouth for much of her childhood. The nurse did reassuringly tell me that the Dr hadn't mentioned 'head gear'. Thank heavens for small mercys! They'll start work on her after some more of her teeth come down. She's excited to get braces though (in a couple of years) and I do kinda get that. When I was young I secretly wanted braces......Soemone had told me that you can pick up the radio through the metal on your teeth. I guess that Aussie skepticism hadn't kicked in yet!

So when my children asked me this morning whether I would be buying them Valetine's gifts and making them pretty cards etc my response was clear. NO. We're bloody Australians and we don't buy into rubbish like that. "why not mum?" Well dear because we're too clever. We're too busy saying sorry and signing Kyoto and helping the good people of East Timor to worry about balloons and leggo. Besides, I can't afford it, I have to save up for braces. xxoo
.

I Miss Home But Then Agin.........

This Blog (or the High Tech Post as my friend Richard calls it) was intended to be a way of friends and family catching up with our adventures and pictures of the kids etc but, it has become a little more. For David and I it has become a kind of online travel journal and it's great to look back on it and read over what we've done and how we've gone and all the stuff that goes along with this strange and amazing adventure.

Australia Day was celebrated here with the baking of Lamingtons. It's strange what you miss! I almost never ate Lamingtons at home when they were everywhere but there you go. If you haven't had a Lamington in a while I urge you to go out this morning and buy one. They are so good! Anyhoo, I took some Lamingtons into Sabine's class and her gorgeous teacher, Mrs Kruger, asked me to give a little talk about Australia Day and what it means. Only too happy to oblige, (i love giving little talks as most of you know!) I enthralled the First Grade with stories of Captain Arthur Phillip and the unfurling of the Union Jack and tales of scurvy and leaving your family forever for stealing a loaf of bread etc. The Lamingtons were a huge hit even if the coconut wasn't right (no dessicated coconut here, only sweetened).

Australia Day of course brought up the thoughts of home that I usually try to keep buried and squeezed up into a little ball. (Taking your advice there Penny) There is a constant buzz in the background for me of missing family and friends and also, that Australianess that I can't quite articulate. But then again.......there are so many moments here when we look around ourselves and marvel at where we are and that also has been a big feature of this week. We have had so much snow that school has been cancelled for four days out of six and looking outside the windows is magical.

This is a picture looking down our street. The local town, where Sabine goes to school and the shops are is about 15 minutes away and is at a lower elevation but it was also covered in snow and the mountains around are glistening white. The top temperature this week has been minus 2 degrees Celsius. What a contrast to our usual Australia Day!

After making Lamingtons with sweetened angel flake coconut I logged on to buy some dessicated coconut and some of the Australian classics that we've all been missing, Tim Tams and Milo, Golden Syrup and Cherry Ripes. (Blue tac too if you can believe that) and it got me to thinkin' that when I leave here there will be lots of things I will miss about America. (We've settled in here so much that we don't even hear the American accent anymore. Sabine apparently has a strong American accent now but I can't hear it.) Anyhoo, here is a list of things I love (and will surely miss) about America.......

Project Runway (ok, I know you can get that in Aus on Fox but I'm so cable TV'd out I just don't think I'd go there again)
Reece's Peanut Butter Cups

Regis
Left hand turns against the lights after stopping at every intersection. It's a road rule.

J Crew

Crazy bumper stickers about Jesus being one's homeboy

The Daily Show with John Stewart (Presidential Race based Comedy)

Zero Cherry Coke

Drive through everything

snow

hats, gloves, scarves

Driving the Mustang. It is so choice.

Insinkerators

My beautiful friend Elaina

So anyway, hope everyone is well. It's so beautiful here that I've included another picture of some deer that was taken in our little village.